Saturday, 15 December 2012

Call me Father Christmas...

Except Santa doesn’t have to queue up in busy shopping centres. I love shopping ordinarily and I was actually looking forward to it. Like I said before, I now enjoy giving more than receiving (if you just thought about oral sex like I did, you have a filthy mind).

This excitement soon wore off. I was still tired and, sorry for being graphic, slightly tasting the vodka from last night. But I’m hard-core so was fine. Without sounding like a Goth, it’s the people that annoy me the most. They’re so self-involved and busy rushing around but wonder why a wheelchair just run into them. Also, the lifts being used by lazy people makes me ‘shake my head’ as the kids say. There was a man waiting for a lift, he felt guilty so took the stairs. That’s fine. However, when using another lift, I was at the front waiting but when the doors opened, able-bodied people piled in. There was not much room but I drove in regardless. It’s their own fault if I run them over. Please use the stairs next time.

So, that is why the words ‘Christmas’ and ‘Shopping’ do not go together. Luckily, I’ve bought all my gifts so can relax now. I wonder what I’ve got you?

Bye for now!

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